Posts Tagged ‘Relaxation’

2013 Lesson Learned: Rest

Posted: December 6, 2013 in Health
Tags: , , , ,

hammockDuring December I will sprinkle throughout the month a few posts regarding key lessons learned for the past year. I’ll kick off the lessons with this post on the subject of rest.

I have noticed both my body and mind yearning for more rest than I’ve given them this year. Even though I have intentionally worked at sleeping at least six hours per night, I know that isn’t enough. It may be more than any recent year in memory when the average was closer to five hours, but if I listen to what the ol’ bod is saying, I have to conclude that somewhere between 7-8 hours per night is what I need these days. That will be reflected in the goals I set for 2014.

Besides sleeping, though, I need more unscheduled down time than I’ve given myself. It’s nice to have ambitious goals at work and outside of work and feel the accomplishment their achievement brings. However, there are too many days when I grow weary of a self-imposed task list that would require me to keep going late into the evening and throughout the weekends if I really did everything on the list. I need time to chill, relax, do something fun and spontaneous or just veg in front of the TV or play with my dog for a while. Doing so rests not only the body but the mind, and rejuvenates the spirit. It contributes to overall well-being in a way that constant activity cannot.

I’ve long had feelings of guilt if I relax too much, so changing that will be an adjustment for me. I’ll really have to battle guilt when I reduce the goals and tasks in 2014 and intentionally increase the hours of sleep and unscheduled fun and relaxation, but I must overcome that in the long-term interest of better health – physical, mental and spiritual.

The title of this post may include the phrase “lesson learned,” but it remains to be seen whether I’ve really learned it or not. I know it, but I will only prove that I’ve learned it and care about it when I change the behavior. Since I do care about my wellness, I believe I’ll do better in 2014, but I have to quantify what that looks like in goals and then make sure I do it. One more hour of sleep and one less hour of structured evening tasks daily equals 14 hours per week of less activity than what I’m doing now. That has to come from somewhere, so the challenge will be in deciding what goes away. Fortunately, I have the rest of the month to ponder that before deciding the 2014 details.

As an educator for most of my life, I’m grateful for lessons learned – even those learned the hard way. So the first big lesson that stands out to me from this year’s experience is this: I need more rest.

ClockWhat do you do to wind down? Maybe at the end of a long day or a long week or even a long project, you have something that helps you put that chapter behind, rest up and recharge for what comes next. So what helps you wind down when you need to do so?

Today, what helped me was to basically ignore my to-do list for most of the day. I’ve grown to somewhat resent my unending to-do list that sits on one shoulder and whispers in my ear constantly including evenings and weekends. So today I spent the majority of the day doing things I hadn’t planned that served as a good diversion and helped me feel like I was in control of my day rather than a list of tasks controlling me.

I did the following out-of-the-ordinary (for me) activities:

  • Browsed a Best Buy store looking over tablets in anticipation of getting one in the next few months;
  • Roamed a mall and serendipitously happened to be there at the same time as my son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter, so we ate lunch together (she gave me a tiny sliver of french fry which she dipped in ketchup and fed me, had me carry her through the mall, and gave me a nice hug before we parted – the day could have ended there and been just fine);
  • Did some online research about the tablets that interested me in the store to learn more and to help refine my possible choices;
  • Took a long afternoon nap with my dog in my man cave with lights out and the sounds of silence;
  • Took a longer than normal walk with my dog at a nearby park that was blissfully empty of many other people for a change;
  • Watched a little football;
  • Ate two good, healthy meals (one a day is normal for me).

I still did a few usual things like making my online social media rounds, email checks, a few minutes of work, playing Frisbee with the dog, making sure I got at least 10,000 steps in (actually more than 14,000 today) and duplicating some CDs to give away at church. But what I didn’t do was anything at all on my to-do list except for making the CDs which only took about 30 minutes.

This was a long, tiring week for me at work. It was more frustrating than usual in one aspect. I needed to wind down. Tomorrow may be another day of largely ignoring the to-do list.

As I look forward to setting goals for 2014, some different priorities will influence how I plan my days next year compared to what has driven me this year. I’ll write more about that at the end of the year, but I look forward to taking winding down to a new level for me not too many weeks from now. I’m excited about it.

So I’ll ask the question again: What do you do to wind down at the end of a day, a week, a project, assignment, or even a career?

swimming

some recent fun time with my granddaughter Abby

My work colleagues and family are very accustomed to me giving too much time to work during my supposed vacations.  If, for example, I take a week “off” from work, I usually end up working 2-3 of those days anyway.  It’s usually by choice that I do so because I love what I do.  Therefore, I gravitate to it in my time off because it’s enjoyable.  But with normal work weeks being 50-55 hours and normal vacation weeks only being half vacation, I thought it was way overdue that I force myself to take some time off, not succumbing to the temptation to check voice mail or email or the internal social network I manage.

With this as my last day of vacation, I am glad to report that I did, indeed, avoid opening my work email for the past eight days.  I have not once checked voice mail or my internal social network messages.  I disabled the software that notifies me of voice mail messages.  I muted the sound on my work laptop so the work-related Twitter notifications would not be heard.  (I still use my work laptop at home because it’s faster and larger than my netbook PC at home, so that’s why the disabling had to be done.)

I did end up working a total of about one hour over the past eight days, but that was to go purchase some items I need when I return tomorrow and to check up once on ongoing technical issues related to the internal social network.  I needed to know what I would be facing when I returned Monday and whether the issue had been resolved in order to know what I might need to do quickly my first day back.

Given my past history, I count working only one hour over the past eight days as a roaring success!  So much so, in fact, that I think I’ll schedule another one in September and perhaps monthly until I’ve used up a lot of my accumulated days off.

What did I do instead of work this week?  I stayed home, mostly.  I read a lot in support of some of my personal goals for the year where I had been lagging seriously behind.  My wife and I took our granddaughter to the zoo one day.  I went to the state fair with my parents.  I took my dog for far more walks than usual and threw the Frisbee with her more times than I can count.  I got a few other errands done that had been hanging over my head for a while.  I wrote more blog posts than in a normal week.  I made sure I got in many more steps on my pedometer than usual, averaging close to 30,000/day for the week.  I took more naps.  I slept when I wanted and got up when I wanted.

“Staycations” at home may well be my favorite vacations of all.  I set the agenda and the time frame and go about my days as I see fit.

I did not disconnect electronically during the week, however, nor did I intend to.  I checked Facebook as I usually do for personal content.  I checked Twitter and posted to it, although I only checked it rarely since most incoming posts are work related.  Whereas I might normally spend two hours an evening on Twitter catching up for the day, this week I scanned it during commercials of a single 30- or 60-minute TV show and let most of it slide on by unread.  I still checked on my blog’s activity, promoted my recent blog posts across multiple social networks, and kept up with personal email.  Technology and vacations can go together just fine as long as the use is personal and not work related.

“So what?” you may ask.  Why make a fuss over doing something that most of the world has no problem doing when they go on vacation?  For me, it’s a pretty big deal because it represents a milestone in my ten-year history at my current company.  I honestly don’t think I’ve disconnected from work that completely for a solid week in the past ten years – not during traveling vacations with my wife, not even during an eight-day trip to China last year.  So this shows me that it is possible and that the world won’t end if I do so.  I have no idea how many emails, social network messages and voice mail messages will be waiting for me tomorrow, but I’ll deal with it and gradually dig out from under them over the next week or two.

Even for those who love their work, it is refreshing and helpful to walk away from it from time to time.  There is value is refusing to let yourself get sucked in to emails or issues that easily and quickly consume more time than you intended to give.  There is a sense in which I can go back with fresh eyes and enthusiasm and dive back in, ready to tackle what lies ahead.

Now that I’ve done it once, I’m looking forward to doing it again.  Soon.