Leap Year Lesson #143: Some Things Become Part Of You Over Time

Posted: May 29, 2012 in Change

Today is the first day in over 33 years I went without wearing my wedding ring.  No, nothing is wrong between Linda and me.  Something wacko happened to the ring finger on my left hand Sunday night that made it hurt considerably all day Monday and swell to the point where I could not get my ring off most of the day.  Once I finally got it off late Monday night I decided to keep it off just in case things got worse with the finger.

I can’t tell you how many times today I instinctively felt for it while walking or sitting at my desk, only to be reminded of its absence once my thumb found nothing there.  It is such a part of me that I feel nearly naked without.  I can’t imagine it not being there.  That’s where it belongs.  If you haven’t had the same experience with a ring, perhaps you have with a watch that you forgot to wear sometime and found yourself looking at your bare wrist over and over again.

Today’s experience with the ring makes me wonder what things have become so ingrained in my life that, even though they may be external to me, they are a vital part of my self-identity.  Of those things or activities, habits or thoughts, which ones are really good and worthy of holding on to and which ones are bad or less than the best and should be left behind?

We can learn to adjust – to make changes we never thought we might.  It isn’t easy, but we can do it.  Perhaps the difficult part is in identifying what needs to change and making the call to do it.

Tomorrow I’ll be glad to put the ring back on wear it belongs.  I just don’t feel right without it.  As for other habits and things it may be time to leave behind… that’s a bit more difficult to figure out.

Leap year lesson #143 is Some things become part of you over time.

  1. Tom White says:

    I totally agree with this lesson, I have a couple of stories about my wedding ring. First when my son played little league baseball and I was one of the coaches, on one occasion I was playing the role of catcher while we had batting practice. Of course I had the catchers mit on. when I got home after a long practice I noticed that my ring was gone. At first I did not want to tell Sheila that I lost it but changed my mind and told her.I racked my brain trying to figure out where I might have lost it. Then it dawned on me, The catchers mit… I looked and sure enough it was there and yes I felt the same way as it was part of me…….. On the second round I was at work installing a new engine in a car, looked down and noticed the ring was gone and this time I had no idea where I might have lost it this time as there most certainly was no catchers mit to deal with. After about two and a half hours another mechanic came to my work area and we were chatting about another problem car. He had no idea that I lost my ring and he said he was washing his hands in the break room and thought he saw a ring laying in the corner in a pyle of dirt, but was not sure because he did’nt go look . He thought it was odd that a little perfect circle would be laying in the dirt. Iran into the room and it was there, He did not know that I lost it. This was amazing. So again for a short period of time I just did not feel right since the ring was gone. Sorry to bore you with this but thought I would share my stories about my ordeals.

    • Jeff Ross says:

      Thanks, Tom. I know how you must have felt.

      • Keith Smyser says:

        Jeff I too had an experience with our wedding ring. When living in Alabama and warming up for a church softball game at night, it was rather cool. Since I am a lefty I threw the ball to the guy I was warming up with at that time. The ring flew off my hand and into the grass. For the next 10 minutes we wound up with both teams helping me look for that wedding ring. They saved my marriage that night 🙂

        Sure enjoy your lessons, good job!


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